The Mystery of Parenting

September 1, 2019

Black parents and boy gesturing with hands and faces that they are confused.

The other day I passed a billboard that read:

Go ask your mother.
Because I said so.
We’ll talk about it later.

Underneath those three statements was this aphorism:
There are no perfect answers in parenting.

No wonder parents increasingly have no idea how to handle their children. From extensive reading in history, I’m aware that every generation of parents believes that the upcoming generation is strange—“Oh, those kids”—but what’s happening now is different.

This generation of parents is becoming increasingly lost and confused themselves. They have no idea what to do with their kids, and as a result, children are raising themselves.

What Your Children are Being Taught Electronically

In their defense, parents now have to deal with children who are bombarded every waking moment on their phones—even during sleep, when they wear ear buds—with music, television programming, uncounted texts per day, apps that inform them with words and pictures of every event in the lives of every person they’ve ever met, and the simply endless, screaming messages from social media.

Most of us are neglecting to realize that children are being taught something every second their brains are functioning. Electronically, they’re being taught one or more of the following, to name just a few messages:

* The world is chaotic and unreliable.
* The world is frightening.
* The world is supposed to be endlessly and increasingly loud and entertaining.
* Approval and worth must be earned, and approval can be measured by social media.
* They must compare themselves to everyone they know in every area of life.

I have yet to see a child or adult who is happy as a result of learning those messages.

What Children Need to Be Taught

A few very fortunate children have parents, teachers, and others who teach them:

* How to be responsible
* The rewards and freedoms that naturally flow from being responsible
* How to feel loved
* How to be loving
* How to be genuinely happy

When children and adults are taught these principles and conditions early enough, with astonishing uniformity they become loving, responsible, and happy.

With very rare exceptions, the electronic voices around children—just a few of which were named earlier—do not teach these life giving principles.

There are Many Perfect Answers in Parenting

Contrary to the wisdom offered on the billboard I read, there are a great many perfect answers in parenting. We really can learn to love and teach our children in ways that are, at times, perfect.

Sometimes the overall process can be bumpy, but perfect answers are there to be found. Shrugging our shoulders and giving up on our responsibilities as parents are not the answers that will yield the results we want.



Electronically, children are often taught messages that do not result in happiness.


Children need to be purposefully loved and taught life giving principles 


Parenting doesn't need to be a mystery. There are a great many perfect answers.

What You Can Do Now

Join with other parents who are experiencing the same problems. Let Greg teach you how to feel loved and not fear your child's disapproval. Click on the button below and watch a free lesson from the Ridiculously Effective Parenting Training course today.

Ridiculously Effective Parenting Training

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Portrait of Greg Baer

About the author

I am the founder of The Real Love® Company, Inc, a non-profit organization. Following the sale of my successful ophthalmology practice I have dedicated the past 25 years to teaching people a remarkable process that replaces all of life's "crazy" with peace, confidence and meaning in various aspects of their personal lives, including parenting, marriages, the workplace and more.