Lost in the Swamp
Years ago, I was in a swamp, looking for a particular kind of lily to plant in a water garden at home. It was getting late, and as I walked, I was sinking deeper and deeper into the water and the seemingly endless mud.
As you look across a swamp, all you see is vegetation and the surface of the water. Often there are no landmarks to tell you where you are, and you don’t know either the depth of the water or the mud.
As the light faded, I became disoriented, and I was up to my chest in water and mud that made every step like escaping from sticky jaws. Swamps are not good places to be lost in the dark, and I knew that I had little time to find my way out, or I could be lost, cold, and miserable all right.
So I slogged onward, and eventually, my feet began to engage mud that was firmer and closer to the surface of the water.
I followed that underwater slope until I reached dry land and the bank of a creek that ran beside and through the swamp. Instantly I knew where I was because previous experience had taught me the relative positions of the swamp, the creek, and the dirt road to civilization. Following the creek bank on dry ground, I found my way out of the swamp.
Every step in the swamp was difficult, but the instant I simply knew where I was, I had the additional and considerable asset of hope. With that hope and orientation, each step was quickened and lightened. The journey was still wet, dirty, and exhausting, but once I knew the way in my head, suddenly, the obstacles seemed almost insignificant.
How Parenting is Like Being Lost in the Swamp
My slogging through the swamp reminded me of how often we struggle through the duties and obstacles of parenting. Before we became parents, the responsibilities of that position were invisible to us, like looking at the smooth surface of water.
Little did we know that under the surface, the depth of the water could vary dramatically from step to step and that we would encounter complex networks of roots to entangle our feet and mud that sucked us down as though it were alive and intent on swallowing us.
In the absence of sufficient unconditional love and instruction, parenting can seem like an impassable swamp, never-ending and never yielding. With enough love and the guidance of mentors, however, we can avoid the worst obstacles and reach out for hands that will pull us out of mud that seems impossible to escape on our own.
We’re given a map we can use to find those areas of shallow water that lead us to dry land.
We need all the loving and teaching from others we can find so that in turn, we can love and teach our children. We can’t eliminate the swamps that surround both us and our children, but we can become equipped to navigate them, survive them, and thrive during the journey.
